First of all, clearly I am fucked in the head. Excuse the bluntness, but there just must be NO other explanation. WHO does that?? Oh, that's right. All the loons I was in line with. Let me tell you, Black Friday bitches are hard core. You don't want to mess with these broads! It was similar to what I imagine exercise hour in the prison yard is like, but instead of a shiv made out of a tooth brush, they'd be using their Lee press on nails to gouge out an eye.
My parents were more than happy to let Chunky Monkey spend the night at their house on Thanksgiving. Frankly, they can't get enough of the kid. My Dad often tells me that C is going to just have to go and live with them. So, Tom and I decided to brave the insanity and hit up TRU when it opened at midnight. There were TONS of sales, but we wanted one specific thing-- the Fisher Price Happy Songs Coupe. It's normaly $60, and it was on sale for $34.
We got to TRU at 11:20pm. I by no means thought I'd be the first nutter in line, but when we drove up, I about died. The line was about a quarter mile long! It was freakin' 34 degrees out!! We parked about 8 lots away from TRU, and trudged over to get in line. The end of the line. I figured a half hour-fort minutes would go by pretty quickly, and it did.
The problem was that they didn't open their doors at midnight. Why, you ask? Because of a bunch of douche-baggery. No joke. A rather large crowd of asshats decided they were too special to need to stand in line like the rest of us commoners, so they mobbed the front. Apparently the TRU employees freaked out, and wouldn't open the doors.
Now, really? Ok, I am in total agreement that the morons should not have been crowding the front. But come ON. It's black Friday, and you decided to open at midnight, when all these fools were still awake, suffering from heartburn, due to the large quantities of turkey they consumed. You didn't plan this out a little better? Open the effing doors!
They didn't open the doors until 12:20. And then they reached their fire code capacity in about 37 seconds. So, they had to start couting... 10 out, 10 in. Yeah. It blew. All I could think was I was going to get in the store, and the Happy Songs Coupe would be gone, and C would end up with some Pretty Princess Castle or some shit like that. Cause I certainly wasn't going home empty handed. There was a rather boisterous bunch'o'broads behind us, threatening bodily harm to every single person that walked by, should they be tempted to cut in line. I was glad Tom was with me!
Once we hit 1am, I started to get concerned about frostbite. I figured we weren't going to stand in line this long, and though I did wear a sweatshirt and jacket, I just had on cotton pajama pants, and a pair of slip on sneakers with no socks. My toes were getting REALLY painful. I took off my shoe and when I saw blue toes, I decided my foot was best kept IN the shoe. All I could think was that my ever lasting reminder of this Christmas was going to be amputated toes.
We finally made it in the store at 1:37am. Tom had to be at work at 8. We made it back to where the cars were and there was ONE left. You can bet your sweet ass I snatched that thing up quicker than Britney Spears popped out here little cheeto-ling babies. Tom had to pee, so I was on my own. I found my way to the check out line, only to discover it was the line to get into the electronics section. Tom found me, and we finally made it to the check out line. It started at the back of the store and wound through about 13 aisles. It was well after 2am when we made it out.
But, we DID get the car. The whole time we were in line, I kept thinking "this isn't the meaning of Christmas" and I do stand by that. If we hadn't snagged a car, it wouldn't have been the end of the world. We are all together, happy and healthy. THAT is what's important. But I do have to say.... I don't regret waiting, since money is so tight for us. And I am SO excited to see the look on his little face on Christmas morning!
So, did you venture out on Black Friday? Mow over any little old ladies who got in your way?
9 comments:
This post cracked me up. I did the midnight BF thing one time, and honestly, nothing was worth being out in that crappy cold for, at least in my opinion. So this year, with my little guy in the hospital, I had no choice, no shopping outdoors for me, but thankfully I was able to get the things I needed online through TRU, and yes I was a fool and set my alarm to wake up at midnight, order what I needed, and go back to bed, despite the fact I have a baby who wakes up many times at night. But the looks on our children's faces on Christmas morning will be so worth it! Glad you got your car! (PS, we have that car, and my 3 and 2 year olds fight over it, so I'm sure Chunky Monkey will love it!)
I am not brave enough to face the crowds. I did my shopping online!
Now that is dedication!!! To be honest, I wouldn't have bothered to go through all that if there wasn't a good few 100 $ in it for me!
In fact, I'm aiming to be in the US in time for next year's Black Fridays, cos dagnammit, I SO wanna experience that! From all the blog postings I've read, I've gathered that it's an experience and a half!
OMG I don't think I have laughed so hard at a post in a long time. Too funny and I can totally imagine everyting you were saying. I'm glad you were able to get the coupe. I unfortunatly had to miss black friday being that we went on vaction no where near stores. When I got home I saw the add for Toys R Us and was bummed at all the good deals.
Great Post.. :0)
Wow. That is a lot of love. I only love my kids enough to shop online! :P
Camp and I went shopping Friday morning, but we didn't start til 8am. We went to Walmart first and then Target. When we got to Target (prob 9am) several foreign men came in the store behind us and started running. The Target employees kept yelling "NO RUNNING!" I thought it was ridiculous, because whatever they were running for was probably long gone since it was four hours after the store had opened!! I like going shopping on black Friday because it's fun and festive. It gets me in the spirit!
I worked in retail for 10 years and last year was my first NOT being in a store. So, no I do not do Black Friday shopping!
Glad you still have all your toes.
I never shop on Black Friday. This year I had to stop in the afternoon on the way to a birthday party to get a gift, but by 2 pm things were calm. If there were ever a deal I really needed, I'd totally send my husband.
I have shopped Black Friday every year for the past 10---but not this year. I was warm and snuggled up in my bed--well my old bed at my Momma's house:)
So, glad you got the car--it really would have been a tragic story if not. LOL
BRRRRRRrrr Hope C appreciates the sacrifice you made!! :) LOL
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